One Month Since DTC!!!-and Pregnancy vs. Adoption

Well, if the next 10-12 months go by as quickly as this one did for our family, we should be ok for this wait. With four kids and all of their activities, time seems to fly by. That's not to say that there aren't days that every darn song on the radio takes me straight into the "ugly cry." I think that part of me won't believe that I have a daughter in China until I am actually in China and holding her in my arms. Another part of me can't rest until she is home. It just seems so far away.

Let me say that I wouldn't be pregnant again for all the tea in China. But I was thinking that when you're pregnant, you at least know where your baby is at all times. You can do your part by eating those darn veggies, etc. to help your baby to thrive. You feel the kicks from time to time and before that, there's the lovely morning sickness to let you know that things are progressing according to plan. You know that he/she is warm and all of his/her needs are being met. You can estimate within a few weeks, usually, when your baby will arrive. Adoption is so different-I have NO control! And for a type A control freak like myself, that is what is so unnerving. My husband's motto has always been, "there is no use worrying about something that I can't do anything about." He's right-and he's calm as can be about the wait. He says that now I know how he feels when I'm pregnant-a bit detached from the whole process-until the baby arrives of course!

Well, since there would be no stitches or bleeding nipples involved in welcoming this baby to our family, I thought it would be easier. It's not...just different.