Today marks 2 1/2 years since China received our paperwork and the wait officially began.If you saw the post before last, you know that last Friday was a rough milestone for me. I was glad to spend the early part of that day at the temple with my husband on our way to Sedona. The peace and the quiet of the temple always pushes my reset button and I'm able to focus more clearly on what is important in the big scheme of things. I thought alot about Meili that day.
That night, I had another dream about her. It seemed freakishly real. I didn't get to see her very well but I held her. She was really warm and I could feel the size and weight of her little head as it rested on my shoulder. I could feel that she had some hair but not much.
In the dream, I came into a large white room. It reminded me of a school cafeteria, but bare. In the room were a bunch of children. They were different ages but all of them had dark hair and appeared to be Asian. I was eager to interact with them and did, even held a few for a few moments before moving on to the next. Then, I came to a baby and picked her up. Unlike the others that I had held, she rested her head on my shoulder and settled in. It was like a piece of a puzzle had been found and I knew that she was my daughter. I also knew that there was little I could do about it but I searched the room anyway for someone to talk to.
I found a man sitting at a small desk and asked him if he was the orphanage director (which was weird because he was white and spoke perfect English.) He said, 'No, I'm the secretary.' (?) I asked if the baby had been sick since she was so warm. He said that she had had a cold, but nothing serious. I told him that I had been waiting for my daughter from China and that I had a log in date but it wasn't our turn yet. Even so, I told him that I was pretty certain that the baby in my arms was my daughter. He looked at me, then checked the papers on his clipboard and said, 'Yes, she's your daughter. It isn't time yet but she is yours.'
It's too bad that I woke up before I could ask when it finally would be time but I like the idea that Meili exists somewhere and that she is already mine...
3 comments:
Your dream gave me chills. I had a dream that I was also in a school cafeteria. The room was full of people and I was there to search for RQ because I needed to ask her a question about my baby.
I have only had a couple dreams about China. I wonder if the closer we get the dreams will happen more often.
Your dream is so cool. I wonder if your spirit was being comforted letting you know that soon you will have the missing piece of your life with you. Oh how I wish you could have been told when!!! Happy 30... now go dream some more good dreams!
Hoping your wait isn't too much longer ;0)
Post a Comment